I now interrupt our regularly scheduled program (cookie week!) for a report from the emergency broadcast system: If you are experiencing holiday overload, drop everything and make this pie. Lick the pan. And when the pie is set, grab a fork and the whole thing and sit down to watch It's a Wonderful Life. Because it is. And so is this pie.
This is a Mr. Pots invention. Before I go on, there are a few more things you need to know about Mr. Pots. 1. he's an engineer. he likes to invent things. or fix them. or figure out how they work, and make them better. this applies to food and everything else in life. 2. he never follows a recipe, but his experiments almost never fail. more often, they're out-of-this-world amazing and delicious, albeit a little out of the ordinary. 3. he has a sarcastic, dry, blunt sense of humor. this is only important to recipes when dealing with spicy food. 4. he is so-named Mr. Pots because if our lives were fiction and we were a famous duo, the personalities we most fit are the combination of Iron Man & Pepper Pots. Since we are, in fact, married, and his name is Adam, not Tony Stark, it's just fun to call him Mr. Pots when I'm feeling equally feisty and sarcastic. there you have it. :)
This is not a chocolate pie for those of you who love a light, fluffy chocolate pie. If you fall into that category, try a chocolate pudding pie, or (a little more complicated, but delightful) French silk pie. This is a pie with a rich, velvety taste and texture. Don't say I didn't warn you.
You can do any kind of crust you like, so long as it's prepared in advance. A regular pie crust, baked, provides a nice salty but simple contrast. Graham cracker is quick, easy and adds a nice crunchy texture. Chocolate graham cracker is one step better. And for that fun, crunchy contrast and a little extra flavor, oreos are the way to go.
First, start out by crushing the oreos. You can do it in a gallon size ziploc bag by hitting it with a rolling pin, stomping on it, throwing it, whatever. :) Or you can be a little more civilized and put them in a food processor. (But why would you want to do that?) Once the oreos are crushed, mix in the melted butter. The mixture will be very dry and crumbly. Transfer to a 9" pie plate.
Press the mixture into the bottom and up the sides of the pie plate.
You can leave it unbaked, but to sort of "set" the crust, (it makes it slightly less crumbly) bake it at 350 for 8-10 minutes.
Now for the pie! Start by combining evaporated milk with egg yolks in a saucepan over low heat. Use a whisk to keep it stirring. And don't walk away. Ever.
If you feel squeamish about the egg yolks, pasteurized egg product definitely works!
Remember how I said don't walk away? This is why. If you let the mixture get to hot, it will curdle. You want to heat it until just before boiling. So you'll see a few bubbles start to pop up but once that happens turn it off! Curdled pie is no good. I threw this batch out and had to start over.
I can't emphasize it enough--constant whisking and DON'T WALK AWAY. Also, don't waste precious stirring time trying to photograph what you're doing.
It'll coat the back of the spoon when it gets to the right consistency. Turn it off and don't look back.
Next mix in the chocolate chips and cream cheese. It helps if the cream cheese is cut into chunks and/or softened so it melts faster and incorporates better. I used half milk/half semisweet chocolate in this particular pie, but Mr. Pots was a little disappointed--we usually go all semi-sweet or even bittersweet. If you like the milky sweet chocolate flavor better, milk chocolate chips is the way to go. If you prefer the rich intensity of dark chocolate, definitely go with semi-sweet, or give bittersweet a try!
Getting the cream cheese to blend in well can be a little tricky,
so I used a stick blender. You can just stir really well or pour into a stand-up blender if you want.
Once it's mixed, pour it into the pie crust.
Let it cool for awhile at room temperature.
Then refrigerate to set completely! Patience is a virtue here. Trust me.
Chocolate Velvet Pie
one 9" pie crust (regular baked, graham cracker, or oreo pie crust recipe below)
1 can evaporated milk
2 egg yolks (or 1/2 cup pasteurized egg product)
2 cups chocolate chips
8 oz. cream cheese
Prepare pie crust. Heat milk and egg in medium saucepan until just before boiling, or until mixture coats back of spoon. Do not boil! Remove from heat and stir in chocolate chips and cream cheese. Allow to melt and blend well. Pour into prepared pie crust. Cool at room temperature before transferring to refrigerator to set completely.
Oreo Pie Crust
24 oreos
1/4 cup butter, melted
Crush oreos. Mix in butter. Press into 9" pie plate. Bake at 350 for 8-10 minutes, or until crust is set.
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